Jealous Therapist Syndrome

“Some people like my advice so much that they frame it upon the wall instead of using it.” ~~Gordon R. Dickson~~

During an Accountability Group meeting yesterday we discussed what one of my partners called the “jealous therapist syndrome”. I Googled it… I think she may have coined the phrase. Basically the point is that it’s often easier to help someone else than it is to help yourself. We have clarity of thought when we look in from the outside. We can give great advice to others, but we don’t always follow our own. We can see what can work for someone else's situation, but have trouble plotting out our own path. A colleague of mine, Ed Han, even posted about it in his blog a few weeks ago as it relates to resumes, and how hard it is to write your own, while being so easy to give opinions on others. In his post, Ed challenges us to “Imagine what more any of us could learn if we had more input from people whose views we trust?” I like the idea! It’s why there are mastermind groups, power lunches with like-minded people, job clubs, and a whole host of other networking opportunities where we can share information and get input from people we trust and respect. Research has shown that job seekers who are members of job clubs land new roles more quickly than those who do not participate in such networking events. Another colleague of mine, Donna Svei, aka Avid Careerist, a resume writer who also writes a great blog for job seekers, strongly encourages job seekers to “show up” and “get yourself out with people” in her post HERE. So – what are you waiting for? Get out there, ask for ideas and input. Seek assistance… but beware the naysayers and the doom and gloomers. Not all advice is good.

Focus: A Productivity Experiment

“When walking, walk. When eating, eat.” ~~Zen Proverb~~

Have you ever read “The Celestine Prophecy” by James Redfield? There is one part that still stands out in my mind, and I haven’t actually read the book in years! Several of the characters are having a conversation, and each turns and completely focuses all of his or her attention and energy on the person speaking. The person speaking, therefore, feels empowered and engaged, and beyond that, experiences clarity of thought and his or her own sense of enchantment. I know people who do this regularly; people who listen to you so intently and seem so truly interested that you feel like the only person in the room.

Have you ever noticed how good you feel when you’re speaking with someone face-to-face and they are focusing all of their attention on you? Have you ever felt the surge of energy when they are not only looking at you while you’re speaking, but they’re intently listening and actively participating (non-verbally) in all you have to say? It’s an incredible feeling, isn’t it? Have you done the same for them in return; basically giving over your energy for the moment?

What if you can turn that focused energy and empowerment into action? What if you *truly* focused on what you were doing at this moment? What if you poured your energy over the tasks at hand? How much more could you get done? How much more fulfilling could it be? The importance of being “present” is something many discuss when it comes to conversation… I’m wondering how much it can impact my productivity. Here’s my experiment: Today I will focus on one thing at a time. Today I will pour all the energy I would direct to a live person standing in front of me to every task I start. I’ll let you know how it goes tomorrow…

Focus: Clarity and Direction

"Clarity affords focus." ~~Thomas Leonard ~~

Have you ever noticed that when you’re introduced to something you had never noticed before, that you notice it all the time? (If not, you will now! ) In all seriousness… it happens to me a lot. I’ll not have ever heard of something, and then I’ll hear it referenced five or six times in relatively rapid succession. Or, I’ll never have seen something, and then all of a sudden it’s all around me… I feel like it’s a message. I choose to believe that when this happens, it’s happening for a reason, and it’s something I need to pay attention to. Well, the thing that has been coming up a lot for me lately is “clarity”. I wrote recently about clearing the clutter. A number of people told me I was making room for new things (figuratively speaking, of course… who needs more clutter???) And a surprisingly large number of people told me that I was “clearing” to get ready for “clarity”; to be completely clear on where I was going, why I was going there, and possibly even more importantly, on how I was going to get there. “Clarity”, as a term, was not one I had used often, and was not one I frankly had heard often until recently. Very shortly after my clearing clutter conversations, a colleague was talking to me about how they really needed clarity, and how they needed to understand on which direction they should focus. That felt familiar to me. I’ve been saying for no less than two years that I really needed to understand more about who my target audience was and how to market to them. The very next day a client was asking me about how to get clarity (and used the word!) in their job search and again, figure out who to target as a prospective employer. I found myself coaching around clarity. And I found I was pretty right on… It was kind of ironic... I was right back to my “physician, heal thyself” post. So I did. Thanks in part to my amazing accountability group, and thanks in part to a few other great listeners and advisors, I feel like I really got clarity. I have a renewed focus. I even redrafted my LinkedIn profile! (Check it out here: http://www.linkedin.com/in/jenniferscott) It was quite the accomplishment, and I feel really good about it! Then yesterday I had yet another conversation on getting clear on direction. This time it was with another entrepreneur who was working on choosing a line of business on which to direct her focus first… It could have been me talking. This time I could really give some great, step-by-step tips on getting clarity. And, I am so happy that I chose to focus on that! I am committed to listening to what the Universe is telling me. When these things come up, I will pay attention to them. I know I have lessons to learn, and I am once again excited by the possibilities!