Create The Good

“It had long since come to my attention that people of accomplishment rarely sat back and let things happen to them. They went out and happened to things.” ~~Leonardo da Vinci~~


This has been a tough year for a lot of people. Between the aftermath of Irene, the earthquake, the floods… the unemployment, the economy, the debt… it’s hard for me to sit here and tell you that everything happens for a reason.

Personally, I have to hold on to the notion that there’s a greater plan, and that I can’t possibly begin to understand that plan, but that’s not the practical advice that “you can use today” that I’ve become known for.

What if, instead, we look for ways to make something good happen from every situation?

Irene, like many of the recent weather issues, created a need for communities to come together in a way I have not witnessed in a while. Families helping one another, even those they don’t know; municipalities offering free services to entire towns in some instances; it has made room for the possibility of everyone actually working as a team moving towards a common goal.

I had a client tell me yesterday that his recent unemployment has given him the time he has not made in a while to take care of himself and get a few things off of his to-do list. He’s been to the doctor, fixed a few things, did some preventative maintenance… and in light of the recent weather, some of this may have saved his house…

I had another client tell me that her (more long-term) unemployment has given her the opportunity to volunteer. As she tries to stay busy and be useful (as well as keep the gaps off of her résumé) she has been working hard in her town to increase the amount of food in the local food pantry and raise awareness about the hunger issues very close to home.

Even in my own family, since the recent passing of my grandmother, my Dad is spending much more time with his father, and creating happiness in his life he hasn’t seen in the last few years. It’s been awesome to hear joy in my grandfather’s voice again, despite the loss of his partner and wife of 68 years!

On Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn, total strangers are reaching across the globe to help others in need. From encouragement and support to resume writing and career help, to fundraising for little-known but highly valuable causes… the world is getting smaller in these times…

I’m not going to pretend that this will always be easy. It will not. I can’t tell you that I always find a silver lining the first time I look. I don’t. But I know that there is one, or at least the chance to create one.

I challenge us all to find a way to make something good happen every day, in every situation, no matter how difficult.

Today I will spread positive energy served with a smile everywhere I go. What will you do today?

Today Is Your Day

“Today is your day! Your mountain is waiting. So... get on your way.” ~~Dr. Seuss~~

The best time to start is today. In fact, the best time to start is right now. It doesn’t matter why you stopped. It doesn’t matter how long of a break you took. Even the number of times you’ve stopped and restarted is irrelevant. If you want to get going again, get going now.

Life is full. You can label that fullness however you’d like. Inconveniences, setbacks, and disappointments; or surprises, opportunities, chances, and blessings… However you label them, the circumstances don’t change. You just need to change the way you think about them, and how you react to them. Whatever they are, whatever you call them, they’re there. And sometimes they’re valid, real reasons to take breaks.

Maybe you took some time off to de-stress a little. Maybe you took a much needed vacation. Maybe you had a family situation that required your full attention. Maybe you simply lost the drive and motivation to keep going. Maybe you just needed to take a break…again. And, maybe, just maybe, now you’re just finding it hard to get back in that saddle. There are still just a “few more things” that need your attention and you’ll start tomorrow… Sound familiar? It’s a little close to home for me! And I choose, right here, right now to get back on that horse.

Life is full of forgiveness. Forgive yourself for the break. But don’t forget that life is for living, and only you can make it happen.

“You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself in any direction you choose. You're on your own. And you know what you know. You are the guy who'll decide where to go.” ~~Dr. Seuss

Motivation: Are you living your life?

“Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else.” ~~Judy Garland~~

Being yourself, when you’re not really sure who that is, is not an easy task. I’ve been participating in a lot of conversations around this topic lately. It seems more than worth exploring. Who are you?

Who are you in regard to a role? Who are you in regard to a job? Who are you in regard to your family? Do those things really make up who you are at all? Maybe the better question to ask is, “Who are you in regard to yourself?”

I was finally able to articulate something yesterday that has been on my mind for a while now… Who I am is evolving. Not only do we evolve as a species, but we evolve as individual people. Who I am today is not entirely who I was yesterday, and that’s a good thing. We are “continuous learners”*. We change, adapt, adjust, learn, grow, and do it again. Our dreams change. Our goals change. Our priorities change. And, as a result of all of this change, the lessons we have to share with others become greater, and more helpful.

So many people have been discussing Oprah’s last show. What stands out for me the most is that she gave her viewers a call to action. She challenged us to go do what we were put on this earth to do; to accomplish what we were born to accomplish; to share our knowledge and our passion, and fulfill our purpose; to live our lives.

Are you living yours?

*Great quote attributed to Margo Rose, founder of #HireFriday, and so much more.

Attitude: More Lessons From My Son

“Enjoy the little things in life, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things." ~~Antonio Smith~~

Do you remember when something as simple as getting to use an electric mixer was sure to be the start of an awesome day? How about when eating pancakes for breakfast was the Best. Thing. Ever. Or, when waiting a WHOLE WEEK until your birthday seemed like an eternity, and you couldn’t think of anything more important than who was coming to your party? Was life simpler then? I don’t think so. 5 year olds struggle enormously with peer pressure (yes, even at that age!), fears, uncertainty, and setting boundaries… That sounds a lot like what most adults suffer from too… so, what’s changed? Personally, I think it’s nothing more than attitude. Sure, the pressure is about more significant things, as are the fears and uncertainty, but you would think that since our power of deduction is also more significant, and our experiences are certainly much more vast, we would be able to handle the pressure as well as the little ones do…

I want to go back to getting excited about the “small stuff”. (And, I’d go as far as arguing that these things really are NOT the “small stuff”!) So, here’s my Attitude Adjustment for today: I will rejoice in what’s REALLY important in my life! I know my day will be awesome because I made pancakes with my son this morning, and we had fun! I’m celebrating the fact that there’s a smile on my face, and one on his too.

Motivation and Celebration

Another thing I learned from my almost-five-year-old son, well, actually from Raffi*… “All I really need is a song in my heart, food in my belly, and love in my family!” (All I Really Need – Baby Beluga)

Celebrating the “simple stuff” instead of sweating the small stuff! What a Monumental Mind Shift!! A relatively easy modification, and yet so powerful and empowering!

Today, I celebrate the things that *really* matter in my life! What will you celebrate today?

*http://www.raffinews.com/raffi/works

Motivation: The Power of Frustration

“Consult not your fears but your hopes and your dreams. Think not about your frustrations, but about your unfulfilled potential. Concern yourself not with what you tried and failed in, but with what it is still possible for you to do.” ~~ Pope John XXIII~~


Negative motivation… I’m wondering if there’s a better word for that. Typically when I talk about motivation, I talk about inspirational, positive things. I write words that make us feel good, things that make us smile. I communicate excitement, share passion… It’s certainly how I prefer to be motivated. But I’m beginning to recognize a flip side to motivation. It’s frustration, feeling “fed up”, feeling overwhelmed (before or after the point of paralysis), and while not nearly as much fun, it might be just as effective for getting things done.

Then I remember that life’s far too important to take seriously, as my Dad would say.

Personally, as mentioned, I much prefer positive motivation, so here’s to the “new me”… again. And, I wish you all the joy in rediscovering the “new you” whenever you need to!

“I would not waste my life in friction when it could be turned into momentum.” ~~Frances Willard~~

Happy Friday Everyone!

Preparation: The Power to Change

“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” ~~Victor Frankl~~

“It is not necessary to change. Survival is not mandatory.” ~~W. Edwards Deming~~

I attended the 6th annual Women in Business Summit* this weekend. It was an incredible gathering of professional women, some entrepreneurs and some corporate, and a great opportunity to network and learn. The keynote speaker, in a rather synchronistic turn of events, was not the scheduled speaker, but instead Karen Hinds, Founder and CEO of Workplace Success Group, LLC. http://www.workplacesuccess.com.

The theme for the event, and therefore the topic of the keynote was The Power to Change. I found Karen’s presentation exhilarating, and want to share with you some of the take-a-ways from my perspective.

You need a plan. If you’re going to change you need to actually prepare for that change. You don’t (can’t) change until you’re ready to adopt that change, internalize it, and make it your new reality. Change isn’t real unless it’s sustained. And, you can’t sustain a change until you are ready and prepared to do so…

Karen gave us an acronym, which as the mother of an almost 5 year old boy, I thought was nothing less than brilliant. You need to ICE it.

1. Identify the thing that you want to change
2. Commit to actually changing it
3. Execute the change

We know, and see it all the time, that life’s lessons are repeated until they’re learned. (You may recall my balance issue or my clearing the clutter episodes…)

What lesson are you still trying to learn? And are you prepared to sustain the change?


*The WIB Summit is organized by Kisha Samuels, the founder of Events of Joy (http://eventsofjoy.com) and you can find more information about WIB here: http://www.wibsummit.com

You can follow Kisha on Twitter @WIBSummit and Karen Hinds @worksuccess. Tell them @HireEffect sent you…

Motivation (and Congratulations!)

“The great thing in the world is not so much where we stand, as in what direction we are moving.” ~~Oliver Wendell Holmes~~

This post is really about how quickly things can change. I originally wrote about a friend’s day, but due to her “big announcement” not yet being public, I removed the original post by request.

Let’s suffice to say that you should never give up! No matter how your day starts, there is a great chance that it will get better. And, if it doesn’t, there is always tomorrow! It doesn’t matter how bleak things look, I do believe there is a light at the end of the tunnel… and that the tunnel simply leads to another. Keep moving in the right direction, enjoy the journey, and maintain your momentum. Life is good, and even when it feels like it’s not, getting through the day sure beats the alternative!

Congratulations again my friend. You know who you are!

Preparation

“It's not what if, it's what now.” ~~Author Unknown~~

What NOW is what’s important. Learn from your past; plan for your future; but live for today. Hmmm… maybe that one will become a quote *I* am known for!

Preparation

“What we do upon some great occasion will probably depend on what we already are; and what we are will be the result of previous years of self-discipline.” ~~ H.P. Liddon~~

This twist on the preparation theme today stems from a rather inspired conversation I just had. I am thrilled that I found this quote! Here’s what I was reminded:

Everything we experience helps shape us for who we become. Every past experience helps us create the responses to the things that will happen in the future. And those responses will create new experiences which may change the way we respond tomorrow. We’re forever learning, adapting, and growing, which in turn helps us to shape bigger and better responses and reactions. So, even though the negativity sometimes gets the best of us, even when our circumstances aren’t what we want them to be, we’re still able to glean something positive. Our trials help prepare us for who we are to become. It seems then, that *life* is the best preparation of all.

Attitude

"There is importance in today; not so much in what happens to us, but in how we respond." ~~Melody Beattie~~

Just the word “importance” could spark an entire post! My dad posted this on Facebook yesterday. Coincidentally one of my long-time friends posted “Mind over matter, right?” as her status update last night. I knew there was a message there for me. Yes! Mind over matter! Choosing how we respond to whatever happens to us is, in fact, entirely up to us. And the important thing about today really may be that we can choose differently today than we did yesterday if we want to. I get chills just thinking about that! How empowering! If you live each day choosing to improve over the day before then even when you feel like it can’t get any better, it does!

What can you improve upon today?

Goals

“A bend in the road is not the end of the road... unless you fail to make the turn.” ~~Author Unknown~~

I would like to shake the hand of the person who first said this. That would be, to me, even more empowering and inspiring than the quote, and the quote is awesome!

Goals, desires, even dreams can grow and change; we’ve discussed that. But it is possibly even more important to remember that WE change too. And, sometimes we have to in order to achieve our goals, desires and dreams. People change. That’s a fact. We grow; we move; our circumstances create new feelings and emotions. We may change hobbies; jobs; thoughts about vacations or spending habits. We may change styles; political parties…we may even change friends. Such is a part of life.

If you have a dream, don’t let anything stand in your way from realizing that dream. It’s ok to focus on yourself once in a while. In fact, some will argue that in order to focus on anyone or anything else, you have to focus on yourself. I’m pretty sure that was the topic of a previous post.

So, make the turn. Take the chance. Be true to yourself. And, the rest will fall into place.

Attitude

“A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.” ~Herm Albright, quoted in Reader's Digest, June 1995 ~~

I’ve been passing this one up for about a year now, but it just seems so fitting today. Sometimes it’s really hard to have a positive attitude. Sometimes you want to be grumpy. Sometimes you want to be disagreeable. Sometimes you want to be angry or sad. OK… so be it. We all have those days. Our emotions can be very helpful, and are very ok to feel.

Growing up I listened to “Free to Be You and Me” a lot. Now I listen to it with my son. This morning one song came on as we were on our way to daycare…

***
ARTIST: Carol Hall
TITLE: It's All Right to Cry

It's all right to cry
Crying gets the sad out of you
It's all right to cry
It might make you feel better

Raindrops from your eyes
Washing all the mad out of you
Raindrops from your eyes
It's gonna make you feel better

It's all right to feel things
Though the feelings may be strange
Feelings are such real things
And they change and change and change

Sad 'n' grumpy, down in the dumpy
Snuggly, hugly, mean 'n' ugly
Sloppy, slappy, hoppy, happy
Change and change and change

It's all right to know
Feelings come and feelings go
It's all right to cry
It might make you feel better
***

So, feel your feelings. Embrace them. And, when you’re ready choose to be positive, and move on.

Goals

"The most important thing about goals is having one." ~~Geoffry F. Abert~~

I think there is a lesson to be learned from my apparent inability to stick to my “plan of the day” on the days I write about goals. Yesterday, I had a very clear plan for today. Then life got in the way. A Honda minivan was driven directly into a classroom in my son’s daycare center; over the curb, across the sidewalk, through the bushes, and right through the wall. Miraculously, nobody was hurt. The teachers, for some inexplicable reason, had decided to take the kids outside early. The classroom was empty. I am eternally grateful to them for that decision.

Needless to say, daycare was closed today, and my “plans” changed. And, while this may be one of the more extreme situations I’ve faced recently (and, yes, really, everything is fine!), it certainly isn’t the only time that my goals were usurped by my reality.

Back to the lesson… I think I need to learn to better be that “river” I’ve written about. I think I need to learn to be more flexible, and “go with the flow” while keeping my eyes on the longer term goals and bigger picture. I know where I want to end up, but I need to stop being so hard on myself when my day’s plans are altered. I have a goal. And, I will get there…someday.

Thursday: Goals

“We will open the book. Its pages are blank. We are going to put words on them ourselves. The book is called Opportunity and its first chapter is New Year's Day.” ~Edith Lovejoy Pierce

Resolution #5

I will live my life to the fullest. I will enjoy my family and friends, laugh, have fun, and remember that life’s meant to be lived, not watched.

Happy New Year my Friends. I wish you love, prosperity, good health, happiness and all the success you can possibly handle.